A Thanksgiving Offer

Thanksgiving conversation got you stressed? Worried that some horrifying comments will spark a food fight or a drunken brawl involving kitchen cutlery and blowtorches? Well worry no more.
As a community service to you guys, I’ll be available to run into the room dressed as a rabbit, shout profanity while juggling bean bags, play a quick little tune on a harmonica very badly, then throw packing peanuts on everyone before running out of the room. That should shake up the energy in the room enough to allow you to easily change the subject.